A telling exchange, via e-mail

M: Only go with me to our friend’s house tonight if it is actually not going to cause you to freak out about time.

C: it is going to cause me to freak out about time. don't you know me? only people who know me from when i used to hide the freak out or who know i used to freak out but whom i didn't tell why i was freaking out would think that a trip to the far west would not freak me out for time.

M: I wanted to give you the chance to pretend that it would only be a
minor freak out. You know, you could say something like, "Oh, there is
just a little too much for me to do tonight but I wish I could go."
And then you'd freak out while I was gone and then I'd get back and
you'd say, "I freaked out a little while you were gone but I'm okay
now." And that way you could have the best of all worlds, you'd freak
out, I'd know you were freaking out, you'd know I know, but you'd also
have the appearance of somebody who is not freaking out and that would
make you be more in control so the freak out wouldn't be so bad.

Or something like that.

I know you're freaking out but I'll remind you of what I always remind you of, we will be okay and there is a long time between now and tomorrow when we leave. It's not like we have a flight that we have to be up for at 5:30 in the morning and you don't have to mentally prepare yourself for a harsh weekend of cold-weather camping. This weekend everyone is going to be focusing on the wedding, we just have to show up and get hair cuts.